Sara Sucks at Fitness Update: New Year, New Perspective

well...

...that didn't go as planned.

On December 28th, with 3 days to go in my challenge, I quit.

There are excuses. I couldn't bend over to touch my toes because my quads and glutes hurt so much.
I had to stay up really late to cat up on some long over-due work one night and missed out on like 85 squats and the thought of catching them up was too daunting.
My body was tired and needed more than just 3 rest days that month, especially because I was doing the prescribed number of squats on top of all of my regular runs, core work outs, and Zumba Step (I love my instructor, but good LORD does she love her squat songs!).
Excuses, valid or no, are still excuses and I was so close that my failure feels like a punch to the gut.

But I need to walk away from it stronger, not weaker. I mean, hells bells. I just did 1700 squats in December.  I'm fairly certain that that's more squats than I'd ever done in my life.  I better have a gloriously strong behind.

More seriously, I need to walk away knowing that because I have come so close now, I can reach my goal in the future.
I need to know that integrating challenges into my daily routine will lead me to a more successful result in life as well as the gym.
I need to know that it's okay to share my progress with others because they'll cheer me on and give me the strength to push through to the finish when I think I'm too tired.
I need to know that, damn, I just did 1700 squats, and that's not nothing.

So happy 2018, folks and blokes. I'll be back at it again in no time.

I'm not a "People-Person"

I have a lot of apologizing to do, I suppose.

I'm sorry to my housemate who walked in my room just a few hours after I returned from a really long road trip to try to tell me something helpful and all I wanted to do was lay in my bed and watch Game of Thrones so I came off sounding like a detached brat.

I'm sorry to all (if any) of the readers of my blog for not posting in a long time.  One thing led to another and then writing began to seem like an obligation rather than something I actually enjoyed.  My apathy got the better of me and senioritis kicked in like it never had before.  Like seriously, I thought I had it bad in high school?  Guess again, kid.  The lack of motivation is paralyzing and, worse, frustrating.  I know I can do better, but I still find myself calling it quits far too easily.

Sorry, self-deprecating ramble.

So here's something new: I'm doing awful at physics again.  How many times will it take me to realize that simple of equations of kinematics depend on where you put the damn sign.  Do you know how many times I've gotten questions wrong simply because I put a positive where I should have put a negative?  Or when I've divided where I should've subtracted?  It's mortifying.

And I think I'm losing my touch.  I'm not able to stay up as late as I used to.  I'm usually in bed by midnight/1 am and all nighters are getting harder and harder to do.  Oh well, I suppose it comes with territory of growing up, along with paying your own rent, deductibles, and taxes. Ugh.

But the amazing thing about not being a people-person is that I am allowed, by society, to retreat into my room like some sort of hermit who found a treasure that she doesn't want to share.  I don't particularly do anything in my room, but sometimes it's nice just to know that I can sit there and stare at the ceiling and hate myself in peace and quiet.  You know, like a kind of introspective opossum.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/fire_brace/

A musing that I would like to leave you with as I go quietly into my goodnight because I soooo need it if I'm going to do well on my physics test on Friday:
Given the current trend of weather (increasingly late summers and winters) and the earth's history of polar reversal, I wonder if, perhaps sometime in my grandkids' lifetimes, America's Independence Day will be held in the winter and Christmas will be held in the summer....
Just a thought.
Cheers!