No, I am not going to debate with you as to whether or not the Bible says abortions are evil. I am not going to listen to you when you call me a baby-killer or a slut-enabler. I am not going to pay attention to anything you have to say regarding my belief because it is MY belief and I will respect your right to YOUR belief even if I do think you're an asshole. Which I don't, because I'm sure you're actually a pretty fantastic person.
Hi, my name is Sara. I'd like to be your friend.
I'm sure I've posted on this before, in one of my women's studies blog-rants, but when we talk about being pro-choice, we usually talk about a woman's right to an abortion. We hear, "Well, it's her life and if she is not able to keep the baby or if she and the father don't think they are ready for it, or even if she doesn't think she's ready to handle maternal responsibilities, then she should be able to have an abortion."
We hear "She should be able to have an abortion."
We hear "Abortions should be legal in all states."
We hear "It would be better to give her a safe abortion than for her to try to do it on her own."
But all of these things talk about a woman's right to an abortion, not her right choose whether or not she wants to keep the baby. And sometimes, we must celebrate her decision to keep her fetus instead of her decision to terminate the pregnancy.
The entirety of the implications of being pro-choice and fighting for reproductive rights of women is to not only ensure that they can get an abortion if they want one, but to also ensure that if they would like to keep the baby, that they are provided safe and sanitary birthing conditions and the means to raise their child with adequate access to food, water, shelter, and education.
Recently, a pregnant teenager in Texas was awarded by the court the right to have her child even though her child's father and her parents were coercing her into having an abortion. According to this news article, (http://news.yahoo.com/pregnant-teen-wins-abortion-battle-150554993--abc-news-topstories.html), her parents took away driving privileges and were verbally and physically threatening her to get an abortion. The child's father, when told, apparently said that the choice was not hers to make and that he himself would drive her to get an abortion.
First off, let me just say, uhhh...no? No, that's not how human beings behave. That's not how you treat your daughter or the mother of your child. What kind of acid are you tripping?
Not the point. The point is, I am so proud of this girl for saying, "Hey, I've had a lot of time to think about this. I think I want a kid. I think I can handle it." (Now whether or not she'll actually make a good mother? Well, that's unknowable at this juncture. But here's taking the optimistic approach.)
I want you to consider everything closely, the costs, the benefits, that weird gray area in the middle, and I want you to make a decision. And even if I disagree with that decision (barring most illegal behaviors and self destruction) I will support you in it.
Voltaire said, "I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it." This is the very essence of the 1st amendment of the Bill of Rights in the United States of America's Constitution (which I've actually been to see, by the way. Fun fact.). I may disagree that becoming a parent at 16 years old is a smart choice, but ultimately the choice is not mine. It's hers. I cannot see into the depths of her heart and mind and soul and know her limits, her strengths, her weaknesses, and her passions. What I, what we, can do is to respect her decision and then get the hell out of her way.
So, R.E.K. Good for you. Defend your right to your body. Take care of your child and good luck to you and him/her in the future.
Love,
Sara
http://www.devon.gov.uk/contrast/more_choice___control.gif
Cheers!
Update: A Facebook friend of mine commented on my link that I posted. She is "fervently pro-life"and in our discussion, she said something very insightful that I'd like to share. "I'm all for people standing up for themselves. I think both positions are hard to judge from an un pregnant woman's perspective. (Not to say that we can't have an opinion.) Neither of us knows what it would be like to wrestle with not wanting to be pregnant, or to feel a baby's kick and feel like a mom." Thanks for your input Heather!
